Eulogy For A Son

Cris, I cannot stop crying. I watch this or read it each time it pops on my screen. I am so sorry, I am sorry we understand this thing. Today may God bless you and keep you and yours. Thank you.

thank you for this...my son is now clean and has been for a year..I pray he continues to do so and realizes there is so much in life and that life has to offer...

Anthony Patrick Fiore, beloved son and brother, lost his battle with heroin on May 31, 2014. He was 24 years old. He lived in a nice suburban neighborhood in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, with his mother, step-father and brother. He was out with friends Friday night after having made a sales call for his job in the Kensington neighborhood of Philadelphia. He came home early Saturday night and he and a friend were sleeping in the finished basement as they often did after a night of partying. His mother found him unresponsive shortly after 12:00 noon. Efforts to revive him were unsuccessful. First responders said he had been dead for several hours.  Preliminary toxicology results found cocaine and opiates in his urine. Final toxicology results are pending. Police are investigating. RIP Anthony. October 11, 1989 - May 31, 2014.  This is the eulogy I delivered at his funeral on June t, 2014: Eulogy for a Son A voice is heard in Ramah, mourning and great weeping, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because they are no more. Today, again, Warrington is Ramah, and we are all Rachel. Another child is no more. I loved Anthony, something that was not always easy to do. Anthony loved Eminem and 50 cent and Lil Wayne. Whenever any of them were about to come out with a new CD, Anthony always knew about it when the news first broke and he had to get the CD the day it came out. He loved movies and had recently developed a fondness for chick flicks. I suppose this shouldn’t surprise me. When he was a baby, his favorite video was “The Little Mermaid.” He devoured each and every Harry Potter novel the week it was published, proudly reporting how many pages he’d read each day. And as each book was made into a movie, he and I would see them, and if it wasn’t the day they were released Anthony was sorely disappointed. He loved candy. He loved his car. He loved his brother. He loved his mother. He loved the Lord. And he loved heroin. Lord how he loved heroin. And because he loved heroin so much and because he thought it loved him back, he’ll never get to take his brother to the Eminem & Rihanna concert this August. He’ll never get to enjoy the case of Sour Patch Kids candy he ordered and that was delivered two days after he died. He won’t get to train Caesar, the Boxer puppy he bought from a breeder in Oklahoma just two weeks ago. And for the first time in years, there’s plenty of recording capacity on the DVR. His death is a shock, but it’s not a surprise. He had been slow dancing with death for more than five years. He overdosed and almost died. His friend overdosed and almost died in front of his eyes. He was arrested. He overdosed again. He was arrested again. He spent a week on the street and a month in prison. And each and every time we said, “Anthony, please, take this as a sign. It’s a warning. Take it to heart. You need to change your behavior.” And each and every time he said he knew and he would. But at some point, each of those warnings was forgotten. And all that remained was the mantra of the young. “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want. I’m only hurting myself.” “It’s my life.” Every time another young person says, “It’s my life,” Satan smiles. “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want.” Yes, of course you will. But your actions have consequences and sometimes your mistakes are irreversible. “I’m only hurting myself.”  Really?  I wish I had words strong enough and true enough to convince you of the staggering selfishness of that remark. And how wrong it is. Almost exactly one week ago my lips were pressed against Anthony’s cold, pale lips, trying desperately to breathe air into lungs too full of fluid to receive it. For the last week his mother has carried one of Anthony’s unwashed shirts around with her, holding it to her face so she can smell him. She sleeps in his bed with his shirt and a framed photograph of Anthony. Everywhere she turns something else reminds her of Anthony. The leftovers from the last food he bought – food was a very big thing with Anthony. The stale remnants of the last soda he ever drank. She wants to die, so she can see her first born again. Nick, who is one of the best people I know, has spent much of the last week with his arm around his mother. Nick, who was already an old soul, has aged 10 years in the last week. I don’t know if he will ever smile again. But, hey, It’s your life. Do what you want. But before you ever again dare say, “I’m only hurting myself,” look at your mother, look up the word ‘inconsolable’ and remember Anthony’s mother. Anthony kept a small scrap of paper with a verse he had copied from scripture pinned above his desk, right in front of his laptop, where he could look at it every day. The prophet Isaiah speaking to God: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” An assurance from the Lord, that gave Anthony comfort. Later in that same verse there are words of comfort for those of us Anthony left behind when he went home: “But your dead will live, Lord; their bodies will rise— let those who dwell in the dust wake up and shout for joy— your dew is like the dew of the morning; the earth will give birth to her dead.” Goodbye my son.

My heart joins with yours in the sadness that no parent should have to share. Your words were so filled with honesty, love, and reality. I too lost my oldest son, 29, to heroin. He left behind a step father who raised him as his own, a little brother, and a heartbroken mother. My son passed on May 20, 2013. I am trying to learn to live again, but this loss has forever changed who I am. My prayers are with you and your family. Our sons are now safe, free from their demons, and in the Lords arms. Bless you.

that was enormously powerful...... brutally honest, no sugar coating....heroin is a death sentence....

After my son Anthony died from Heroin, God used me and used Anthony’s tragic death to save a young woman I had never met. On June 8, 2014, the day after Anthony’s funeral, I posted the eulogy I delivered, hoping it might strike a chord that hadn’t yet been struck with some addict somewhere. Many of you shared it. Thank you. Some of your friends shared it, and some of their friends. Etc., etc., etc. Somehow, it reached “Abby.” On June 12th I received the following private Facebook message: “Your son died on my birthday. I just turned 23 and I have been addicted to heroin since I was 17. I don't want to ruin my mother’s life by dying. But I can't stop.” We messaged back and forth. She gave me her phone number and we talked. Eventually she agreed to join “The Left Behind” – a private Facebook group I created for addicts and their families -- where she has shared her story and received a lot of support. Abby has been clean for nearly 2 months now. Detoxing was rough. Because of some previous bad experiences, she refused to go to a clinic, choosing instead to detox on her own with the help of her best friend. She relapsed a number of times. But each time, she got back up and went right back to the hard work of regaining her sobriety. She knows she is not “cured.” She knows she has to work to stay clean every single day, but she is determined to do it and I believe she will. Recently Abby told me that reading Anthony’s eulogy was her “breaking point.” But she would never have seen it from my Facebook page. We weren’t friends. Somebody had to share it -- probably several some bodies -- before it reached her. I don’t know how many degrees of separation there were between Abby and me, but it was more than one. So whatever role my eulogy played in helping Abby decide to get clean, everyone who helped move it along the electronic highway to her played just as big a role. And we can do it again. There are other Abbys out there. I know there are. Obviously, not every addict who reads my eulogy, or sees the YouTube video will make a life changing decision as a result. But Abby did. And if it reached her, maybe it will reach others. And that is why I am asking you, even if you have done it before, please share, re-post, e-mail, text, message, and urge your friends to do the same. Do whatever you can to get my eulogy out where it might do some good. Together, we just might keep another Abby from becoming the next Anthony. Thank you. EULOGY FOR A SON Eulogy For A Son A voice is heard in Ramah, mourning and great weeping, Rachel weeping for her children and refusing to be comforted, because they are no more. Today, again, Warrington is Ramah, and we are all Rachel. Another child is no more. I loved Anthony, something that was not always easy to do. Anthony loved Eminem and 50 cent and Lil Wayne. Whenever any of them were about to come out with a new CD, Anthony always knew about it when the news first broke and he had to get the CD the day it came out. He loved movies and had recently developed a fondness for chick flicks. I suppose this shouldn’t surprise me. When he was a baby, his favorite video was “The Little Mermaid.” He devoured each and every Harry Potter novel the week it was published, proudly reporting how many pages he’d read each day. And as each book was made into a movie, he and I would see them, and if it wasn’t the day they were released Anthony was sorely disappointed. He loved candy. He loved his car . He loved his brother. He loved his mother. He loved the Lord. And he loved heroin. Lord how he loved heroin. And because he loved heroin so much and because he thought it loved him back, he’ll never get to take his brother to the Eminem & Rihanna concert this August. He’ll never get to enjoy the case of Sour Patch Kids candy he ordered and that was delivered two days after he died. He won’t get to train Caesar, the Boxer puppy he bought from a breeder in Oklahoma just two weeks ago. And for the first time in years, there’s plenty of recording capacity on the DVR. His death is a shock, but it’s not a surprise. He had been slow dancing with death for more than five years. He overdosed and almost died. His friend overdosed and almost died in front of his eyes. He was arrested. He overdosed again. He was arrested again. He spent a week on the street and a month in prison. And each and every time we said, “Anthony, please, take this as a sign. It’s a warning. Take it to heart. You need to change your behavior.” And each and every time he said he knew and he would. But at some point, each of those warnings was forgotten. And all that remained was the mantra of the young. “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want. I’m only hurting myself.” “It’s my life.” Every time another young person says, “It’s my life,” Satan smiles. “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want.” Yes, of course you will. But your actions have consequences and sometimes your mistakes are irreversible. “I’m only hurting myself.” Really? I wish I had words strong enough and true enough to convince you of the staggering selfishness of that remark. And how wrong it is. Almost exactly one week ago my lips were pressed against Anthony’s cold, pale lips, trying desperately to breathe air into lungs too full of fluid to receive it. For the last week his mother has carried one of Anthony’s unwashed shirts around with her, holding it to her face so she can smell him. She sleeps in his bed with his shirt and a framed photograph of Anthony. Everywhere she turns something else reminds her of Anthony. The leftovers from the last food he bought – food was a very big thing with Anthony. The stale remnants of the last soda he ever drank. She wants to die, so she can see her first born again. Nick, who is one of the best people I know, has spent much of the last week with his arm around his mother. Nick, who was already an old soul, has aged 10 years in the last week. I don’t know if he will ever smile again. But, hey, It’s your life. Do what you want. But before you ever again dare say, “I’m only hurting myself,” look at your mother, look up the word ‘inconsolable’ and remember Anthony’s mother. Anthony kept a small scrap of paper with a verse he had copied from scripture pinned above his desk, right in front of his laptop, where he could look at it every day. The prophet Isaiah speaking to God: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” An assurance from the Lord, that gave Anthony comfort. Later in that same verse there are words of comfort for those of us Anthony left behind when he went home: “But your dead will live, Lord; their bodies will rise-- let those who dwell in the dust wake up and shout for joy-- your dew is like the dew of the morning; the earth will give birth to her dead.” Goodbye my son.

Gorgeous and raw and true. God bless your family. We are currently going thru the same thing. Until you do, these words don't hit as hard. Every single one is a truth dagger. Thank you. Prayers for healing.

So sorry beyond words for your loss. But wanted to say " thank You" for sharing your son's story so that it may help others. God bless you and your family.

Godspeed to you and your family, I lost my brother to a morphine overdose in 2010, I understand your pain first hand. God bless you.

I am so sorry for your loss..it is never easy burying a child..When we all know we should be the ones to be buried not the other way around..we should not.be burying our children.i don't know how old Anthony was..but I have a 20 year old son.who has said the same thing to us about it being his life.he has everything under control. ..The only one he is hurting is himself..i don't want to lose my son..because losing my child will literally kill me.and my heart goes out to you and your family may God bring healing and peace..

Thank you !Bless you and all who love him..There pain ends and ours just begins .Rip. all our angels.We love u hope u can feel the love we have for you now....

"...goodbye my son." So powerful....

Chris,  My heart breaks for you and your family and all who loved Anthony.  I have shared your story and have shared countless others in the hopes of reaching the hearts of those that struggle with opiate addiction.   May you continue to find the strength each day to move forward.  Rest peacefully Anthony. 

It is almost the same story as my son Dylan who OD'd almost 2 weeks before Anthony his first day out of a rehabilitation facility after missing his flight home. Dylan hated his disease of addiction. But he also loved his drugs and when he was high they loved him too so he thought. Heroin killed him. We were powerless to save him but together many families are joining together to help fight this disease and save other loved ones before it's to late. You can see Dylan Yates story on YouTube also. Thank you Cris and Valerie. You are both so strong. God bless!

The death of a child regardless of age or how they passed is one of the most devastating parts of life. In a sense, the hope of the future has now left us. Many of us live life through the successes, achievements and endure the hardships of our kids. Truly, our life will never be the same with the passing of our only child and beloved son.

I just watch this. You are a good man. You told the truth!

What a great family. Love to you all.

As a parent, this video got to me. Reading the story behind it, touched me to my soul. Bless you and your desire to help even one person not perish in the grip of drug addiction. I will pray for you and your family.

My son died when he was 27. This is the hardest thing a family can ever go through. Mine died 14 years ago, but he still with me every day. It gets easier, but it never goes away. God bless this family.

With Kind regard, well spoken. As a mother, I am very sad for your loss. May you have peace.