Ridiculous Examples of Corporate Doublespeak
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2023-05-30に共有
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コメント (21)
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Thank you Simon for sharing your embarrassing story. Everyone's human.
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If the bus mistake is the worst thing that ever happens to Simon, he's in good shape.
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My favourite thing about that United Flights story is how easy they made it for other airlines to advertise after that. WestJet literally put out an ad that only said “WestJet. We don’t over book” 😂😂😂
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Simon you have enough followers to have your own country with a decent GDP. Showing you adverts for a F22 isn't the worst idea.
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I think we need a Blaze where all of the writers from Simon’s more casual channels submit their own blurbs. A “Top Ten Most Embarrassing Stories from Simon Whistler’s Writers,” perhaps? (Or maybe that would just turn into them swapping basement war stories and unionizing.)
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If anyone's interested about the SpaceX launch, The concrete pad underneath was destroyed aswell as damage to the tank farm nearby and the shuttle experienced a safety failure in regards to the self destruct, it failed when it was initialised and took far too long for the shuttle to destroy itself which is why it tumbled for so long.
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The launchpad was not, in fact in “one piece”, it was pretty badly damaged during the launch (which also caused the engine failures)
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"Rapid unscheduled disassembly" I don't think is corporate doublespeak. I think that's just a rocket scientist joke. Just like computer technicians call banging it until it works "percussive maintenance".
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"Rapid Unscheduled Dissasembly" was first a meme from the Kerbal Space Program commmunity, i think they're just having a bit of fun
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Compared to the story about the Greyhound bus murderer in Canada Simon told us about way back when, his experience on the bus sounds positively delightful.
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A car that doesn't have power steering handles way differently than a car that has power steering but is broken. It helps to be moving before you try to steer if you're in this situation.
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My dad was a respected figure at ESA, and one of the things he would say before a launch was: “remember, no matter how hard you work on something, there is always a chance it will explode. If you’re able to still gain knowledge from that explosion, then who’s to say it was a failure?”
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The part about Toyota that made me laugh was their slogan at the time of the recall. "Moving forward". I used to say "moving forward, like it or not".
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Honda sent out a recall for civics 2 years ago. The letter was very vague, and non-urgent sounding, demanded a recall on our time and dollar (to find the time to go to the manufacturer) and it didn't seem urgent from the first letter. About a year later, they sent a follow-up letter saying if we hadn't fixed it, we had to, and explained that the passenger airbag launches metal SHRAPNEL when it engages. If they had said that in the first letter, we wouldn't have driven around in a death trap for a year.
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If an airline wants to get 4 people off an airplane all they have to do is offer the economy class passengers seats in first class on a second flight.
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Fun fact: I've had an EvE Online "Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly Expert" shirt for many years. made this all the more amusing
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Beginning with Simon possibly sharing an embarrassing story is a great hook
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Umm the launch pad is also fucked up. They didn't use diverters, so all the heat went straight into the pad and launched bits and pieces all around.
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There needs to be a competition between Danny and Kevin to see who can make Simon go on the most tangents.
